The other day I was sitting in the office, sharing a bag a popcorn (sort of) and I got this very sort of sad feeling. The issues are coming in and we are getting sweet mugs and t-shirts, so I knew that wasn't the cause.
Some very dear members of the olivetree review staff are getting the hell out of dodge. (those rascals).
Here are some near and dears who have decided that graduating from CUNY Hunter is a good idea (I personally have been here awhile, but have not come that close to filing for my degree. "Give it awhile...." I say, let me finish my major up and then take requirements like the idiot I am...or older transfer student I am, whatever) and will be missed by TH 212. They will always have a place here. They will no longer have a key, and the phone is disconnected, but still:
Known as "Sal" Jack of all trades. Proclaimed smartstuff and reader of foreign languages. A good travel guide and not an asshole. Completely thorough in everything he did. I saw his transcripts recently, and holy smokes, some one fucking give him the Hunter College award for not ever having a No-Credit in any semester (and having a GPA spiked like a rogue diabetics sugar level). Sal- a great guy who didn't like people I thought were stupid too (& more!). Could a person ask for a better cynical partner-in-eyebrow raising? Congrats on all the Dino Run wins, as well.
Known as "Steeeeeeeeve" by Zoraida. Commonly referred to as "Steve what do I do?" by everyone else. The answer man. (He also pretends to hate people who annoy him, but secretly loves it.) Another Staten Island commuter. Props to him and Sal for that. Steve speaks several languages of video game on many different interfaces. He's taken many budget proposals from annoying people who can not do math. I have never once annoyed Steve in my entire life and he may resent me for that. Perhaps I should have given him a proper ribbing.
An awesome lady by all. A fierce one too. One of the sweetest people I've ever met who can kick major ass, read Dickens like a boss, laugh with me about inappropriate things, and share a passion for being awesome. A role model for any little lady or dude, and someone who really gave a shit. A rarity these days. Knowledgeable on all fronts from nutrition and exercise to "how to wear the best threadless t-shirts." You are loved Thesanica!
What the fuck can I say about Irina? Perhaps she was one of the only people I could initiate a talk with about what would be the best and worst food to have sex IN. Irina is raunchy, disgusting, and one of my favorite people. She is far too clever for her own good. To trump her in any pun is a major feat (as it is basically impossible). She knows ridiculous facts about ridiculous things. A major loss to the office. I'm getting more and more sad as I go on. This sucks.
Farewell Master Poetry Editor. I never got to know Kim well enough, because she is one busy mofo. Always popping in and out and microwaving delicious smelling food and peacing hard. Always claimed she was going to "cut a bitch" (her stress humor is unparalleled), but I've concluded that she is a complete sweetheart and will buy you coffee instead. It goes without saying that Kim is also disgustingly talented. I did some copy editing recently for an issue and it was only her shit that was in check. I'm not even lying. Congrats to her on winning that huge boss prize, may she either get into law school or write another book that puts us older cats to shame(bles). Can I suck up a little more? Farewell mami.
Dude. David is the sweetest guy ever. He's also a fantastic shit-talker. I know those two don't seem together but in this instance you'll have to trust me. I keep forgetting he's graduating. He hosted the last open-mic and he didn't suck at all. Always down for thirsty thursdays, always down for some hysterics. A fiction editor, he recently read a piece outloud and included witticisms in smooth delivery, rendering laughing fits inevitable. What a smart-ass this guy is. The office dynamic will be thrown off by the absence of a charisma only a frustrated holy man of his sort (he'll deny it) can implement. Mazel Tov. David is graduating right? I keep forgetting...
Anyway, that wraps this up. If I'm forgetting anyone, I apologize. I wanted to let these people know how much they'll be missed. Perhaps I'll edit in some photos later on. You probably thought I didn't care at all! Suckers! I really do have a heart. I probably write about you. Shit, all of those open-mic performances were about you! On the serious tip, good luck with all the nastiness you encounter outside of Thomas Hunter and the 68th street bistro. Thanks for all of your help- thanks for being part of a delicate instrument that looks so hard in black type with an issue number, but is really just a bunch of people shooting the shit and trying to make things work.